Alaia* had been in an abusive relationship once before, with her child’s father. Her child was picked up from school one day by Dad and not returned. She had been violently assaulted by her new partner but the pain of not being with her child made her want to not go on. Alaia said “The day I rang for help, the day I realised it was time for me to leave, it was the last time I let my abuser hurt me.”
Alaia did not want to report anything to the police, but wanted to have a safe planned move out. She could only leave on a day when her partner would be at work but needed to move fast as he often made unannounced visits back to the house to make sure she was at home. Once the referral and risk assessment was completed, a plan of action was agreed with Alaia to get her to the refuge safely.
Alaia recalls the day she arrived to the refuge, she was met by two staff who comforted her and told her “I was safe now… it was genuinely one of the most empowering moments of my life.” She recalls the warmth and concern she saw in all the staff for her, the “warm cup of tea and shown to my lovely new home, there was a little basket of things waiting for me… I realised I wasn’t alone in this anymore.”
Alaia was allocated a Domestic Abuse Support Worker and the Children & Young Persons Support Worker to work through her individual goals and outcomes in a trauma informed way. The refuge staff worked together to ensure she continued to feel safe and supported during her stay.
You can help
£12 could buy toiletry essentials (shampoo, shower gel, toothpaste, toothbrush and deodorant) for a woman in our refuge for one month
“The next couple of weeks I knew I had a fight on my hands, staff was there every step of the way and helped me find the courage I needed to report my abuser and help me get my child back.”
Alaia was accompanied at the court hearing where staff advocated on her behalf.
Alaia and her child were referred for further specialist support within the Survive & Thrive consortium where they had one to one and group sessions to support with their trauma and to re-establish their parent-child bond. Alaia was also referred for counselling support.
Alaia showed a marked improvement during our internal regular assessments and evaluations. She said her Domestic Abuse Support Worker “made me laugh till my belly hurt, stood up for my rights as a woman and made me believe I was worthy.”
Alaia’s partner was charged with stalking and harassment and remanded in custody. She and her child are safe, happy and thriving in their new community.
*Name has been changed
You can make a difference
You can make a difference to women’s lives like Alaia, by donating to Staying Put and enabling us to continue supporting people experiencing domestic abuse.