Today would have marked the 40th birthday of Shafilea Ahmed.
Instead of celebrating a life filled with promise, we remember a young woman whose future was stolen. Shafilea had ambitions to become a lawyer, to build a life on her own terms, and to pursue her dreams.
Those dreams were cut short when she was murdered by her parents after refusing an arranged marriage, in what is widely recognised as so-called honour-based abuse.
At the time of Shafilea’s murder, the law did not recognise honour-based abuse as a distinct form of abuse. There was limited understanding of the warning signs, the unique risks faced by victims, and the barriers that prevented many from seeking help. Too often, victims were failed by systems that simply did not understand the reality of the abuse they were experiencing.
Much has changed since then, thanks to the tireless work of campaigners, survivors, and specialist organisations. Through the dedication of Karma Nirvana and the support of Cosmopolitan magazine, Shafilea’s birthday is now recognised as the National Day of Memory for victims of Honour-Based Abuse. It is a day to remember those whose lives have been lost, to stand alongside survivors, and to renew our commitment to preventing future tragedies.
This year also marks another significant step forward. In April, the Crime and Policing Bill received Royal Assent, introducing, for the first time, a statutory definition of honour-based abuse into UK law. This landmark change provides greater clarity for professionals, strengthens legal recognition of this form of abuse, and sends a clear message that these crimes have no place in our society.
While legislative progress is vital, laws alone cannot end honour-based abuse. Awareness, education, and early intervention remain essential. Professionals across education, healthcare, policing, social care, and the voluntary sector must be equipped to recognise the signs and respond appropriately.
Communities must also continue challenging the harmful beliefs and behaviours that allow abuse to be hidden behind concepts of family honour, culture, or tradition.
Organisations such as Karma Nirvana have led the way in transforming understanding of honour-based abuse. Through advocacy, specialist support, training, and campaigning, they have helped ensure that more victims are heard, believed, and protected. Their work has undoubtedly saved lives and continues to drive meaningful change across the UK.
As we mark what would have been Shafilea’s 40th birthday, we remember not only the life she lost but the legacy she has left behind. Her story has become a catalyst for change, influencing public awareness, professional practice, and the law itself.
Today is an opportunity to reflect, to learn, and to recommit ourselves to protecting those at risk of so-called honour-based abuse. By remembering Shafilea and every victim whose voice has been silenced, we honour their lives not only through remembrance but through action.
No one should ever have to choose between their safety and their freedom. Shafilea’s legacy reminds us why we must continue working towards a society where everyone can live their life free from fear, coercion, and abuse.
Alongside this sits the broader theme of Roots to Routes, which reminds us that identity is shaped by both heritage and journey. It speaks to where we come from, the paths we have taken and the contributions South Asian communities continue to make across every aspect of public life.
For South Asian communities, those roots are grounded in rich culture, resilience, faith, language and tradition. The routes reflect stories of migration, labour, leadership, creativity and service often in the face of exclusion and inequality. These are not just stories of heritage; they are stories of shaping Britain itself.
At Staying Put, we see every day the strength of diverse South Asian communities, alongside the reality that many still experience structural barriers; discrimination and inequality in access to safety, opportunity and voice. We cannot meaningfully talk about celebration without also being honest about these lived realities.
As a CEO of South Asian heritage, this month is deeply personal. I am conscious of the progress made, but also of how fragile belonging can feel when identity becomes politicised or reduced to debate rather than lived experience. Unity in diversity must mean more than words, it must be demonstrated through leadership, accountability and a sustained commitment to dismantling inequality in all its forms.
This includes creating organisations and services where psychological safety is not optional, where cultural competence is expected and where people are not required to dilute who they are in order to belong.
South Asian Heritage Month is therefore both celebration and responsibility. It is a call to listen more deeply, to confront inequality more directly and to ensure that inclusion is not performative, but embedded in how we lead, decide and act.
From a leadership perspective, this is not a “values statement” but a practical imperative. In the current climate, it is precisely this commitment to equality, inclusion and the lived value of diversity that must be actively protected, strengthened and evidenced in how we operate as organisations and as a society.
From all of us at Staying Put, we are proud to stand with South Asian communities in honouring this month and in recommitting ourselves to a society where unity in diversity is not an aspiration, but a lived reality.
Yasmin Khan
Chief Executive Officer
You can help
You can make a difference to women’s lives by donating to Staying Put and enabling us to continue supporting people experiencing domestic abuse.